not literally. i am talking about SING. It's the largest off Broadway production in the country. It's 4 1/2 hours of amazing-ness. My sorority, ADPi, has done an amazing job. I have been so blessed to find these incredibly unique, genuine girls. they have helped so much with everything that's going on. So good luck tonight ADPi about finding out about Pigskin!!
Still not sleeping. Didn't get a chance to pick up my prescription and man, was that a bad idea. Luckily, today is Saturday. I did a lot of fading in-and-out sleeping, which is better than nothing. I'm trying a new dose for a couple times and then I'll be switching to yet another medicine. I understand on an intellectual level that this is a trial and error process, but on a physical and realistic level, I'm really really frustrated. I'm tired and can't function. I have tests all the time, and while I thoroughly enjoy being busy, my I'm still adjusting to being in a sorority and balancing time, and it's only going to get busier. This situation needs to change, but I really don't know if it's going to. I'm really looking forward to spring break, in one week, with my parents. We're going to Mexico, to an all inclusive resort. I just want to read and sit on a beach and feel warm. And hopefully not get incredibly sun-burned like i did last year. I went to Mexico last year with my parents and 14 other friends, and this trip is making me miss all of the girls I grew up with. I hate it when songs are right. The whole "you don't know what you got till its gone" thing. I didn't realize how much seeing all of those girls impacted my everyday life. I have magnificent friends at Baylor, but I've known some of these girls for 17 years. This year is all an adjustment I suppose.
Two tests and a paper due this week, finally got the other paper done at like 4:20 that morning. I missed meeting with my Baylor Buddy, a 12 year old at risk middle schooler, again. I've been having trouble with her, she's had an epic attitude change for the worse and I'm not really sure how to handle it. I get incredibly stressed just thinking about it. She's so smart and used to be so sweet, but now I have no clue what's going on and she won't talk to me. I'm going next week for sure to have a serious conversation and let her know that if she doesn't start getting her act together that its upsetting me too much to continue trying to help her. While I feel horrible about that, the truth is, I'm at Baylor to get an education. I want to spend the rest of my life helping people, but I have to get there first.
All of this to say, I'm tired and stressed and ready for spring break. I'm hoping things will improve after that. Until then, I just have to tough it out, i guess. I'm off to get ready to find out ADPi's fate in Sing.
Until next time.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
oy with the poodles already.
it is currently 2:09 in the morning. i have currently done 2.9 pages out of my 5 page paper due exactly 11 hours and 51 minutes from now. I was inspired to do this in two parts. first, julie and julia. don't worry, i have no idea how to cook and even if i did my 12x15 dorm room doesn't allow for a lot of whisking and what not. second, i was just on one of my sororities sister's facebook in a continuous effort to avoid my paper and saw that she had one. I read through it and was hit with the realization that this could be a great outlet...even if no one reads it, which is totally what i'm predicting. so here I am, eyes drooping, back aching, deciding to start something new.
for those of you who don't know me here's the deal: i'm a mess. on the outside, on paper even, I look pretty legit. I know what I want to do with my life at a ripe age of nineteen, and have the plans to get there. I make good grades, am in a sorority, have great friends, an unceasingly generous and loving family, a precious dog, Hute, and more blessings than I can count. I'm generally the group clown and delight in making never ending witticisms such as, "that's what she said," and "your face." my mom is so proud. to the outside world i'm Brenna the confident kid always on the run always doing something goofy.
on the inside: i'm a 19 year with generalized anxiety disorder, functional dyspepsia, and a sleeping disorder. Everyday is a struggle. It takes hard work to even get to act stupid around my friends, let alone get through homework at a decent hour, hence my blogging at 2 in the morning. i'm tired. incredibly tired. more tired that people probably realize. because of this it's very hard for me to be moderately productive. this includes even being able to function and get to class. on top of that, when i'm not functioning due to lack of sleep, I worry about being able to do my assignments, get good grades, do my laundry, not go crazy with the science experiment gone wrong of a 12x15 room shared by 2 college freshman with a bunch of stuff, not bug my wonderful roommate with all of these stupid problems, and the list goes on and on. I get through everyday hanging on a thread and am in reality nothing like people see me as on the outside.
i'm kinda gonna use this to be just me. and as i'm anticipating that i will be only one reading it...thats fine with me.
Paper calls.
for those of you who don't know me here's the deal: i'm a mess. on the outside, on paper even, I look pretty legit. I know what I want to do with my life at a ripe age of nineteen, and have the plans to get there. I make good grades, am in a sorority, have great friends, an unceasingly generous and loving family, a precious dog, Hute, and more blessings than I can count. I'm generally the group clown and delight in making never ending witticisms such as, "that's what she said," and "your face." my mom is so proud. to the outside world i'm Brenna the confident kid always on the run always doing something goofy.
on the inside: i'm a 19 year with generalized anxiety disorder, functional dyspepsia, and a sleeping disorder. Everyday is a struggle. It takes hard work to even get to act stupid around my friends, let alone get through homework at a decent hour, hence my blogging at 2 in the morning. i'm tired. incredibly tired. more tired that people probably realize. because of this it's very hard for me to be moderately productive. this includes even being able to function and get to class. on top of that, when i'm not functioning due to lack of sleep, I worry about being able to do my assignments, get good grades, do my laundry, not go crazy with the science experiment gone wrong of a 12x15 room shared by 2 college freshman with a bunch of stuff, not bug my wonderful roommate with all of these stupid problems, and the list goes on and on. I get through everyday hanging on a thread and am in reality nothing like people see me as on the outside.
i'm kinda gonna use this to be just me. and as i'm anticipating that i will be only one reading it...thats fine with me.
Paper calls.
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